For A Thousand Generations
By Michelle Rocker
Abuse is something that I really struggle to grapple and understand. I know that bad things happen because sin is in this world. But I’m always asking God how can he look on when children are molested, children or women are physically and mentally abused, or a woman being raped. I’ll be honest I don’t get it, and honestly, I’m not sure I will “get it” until I get to heaven.
After coming to this entry into my diary, and thinking about what I could share that I have found in scripture, I’ll admit I was at lost. I prayed and read through every scripture I could find about children. I came to a chapter in Matthew that I believes gives us some insight into how God cares for what happens to the innocent, especially children, and what he says will happen to those who hurt children. One thing became abundantly clear to me: Jesus loves and adores little children.
Mark 10:13-15: People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
In Matthew, Jesus was talking to his disciples who were fighting over who was going to be the favorite when they got to heaven. Once again, Jesus patiently explained by bringing a child forward, and tells them that they have to have the same heart as a child in order to be great in his kingdom. Then Jesus continues in Matthew 18:5-13: “And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to sin! Such things must come, but woe to the man through whom the come! If you hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and thrown in the fire of hell. See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. What do thing? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way, your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.
I want to encourage you to read that scripture again before continuing. I came to my own conclusions that God revealed to me, and ask God to reveal it to you, especially if you are a victim of abuse or you are a person that has inflicted abuse on someone else. Several things stuck out to me. In Mark 10, he was “indignant” when the disciples tried to prevent the children from coming to him. He told them to not “hinder” them from coming to them.
In Matthew 18, Jesus warns in this passage that children will be mistreated. He says, “Such things must come.” But he also makes it quite clear about how he feels toward the abuser: But if anyone causes one of these little ones to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Those abuser’s who continue to continue in their path of harming and defiling the precious, innocent children are going to suffer worse then the children they have abuse.
I have so often wandered how God could allow abuse, and look on as a child is victimized. I think it all comes back to God doesn’t want robots serving him. He wants every man to choose to serve him. But as you well know, there are those who choose to live in sin. Not everyone will choose life in Christ. Romans 6:23 says, “The wages of sin is death.” And, wow, have we not seen wages sowed into pornography? I firmly believe that pornography is one of the reasons there are so many abduction of children, why the number there is such a number of women raped, and eventually why the little ones and women are killed. It is inevitable that the innocent will be harmed because of the wages that some men make the choice to perform.
I was watching a show where Hugh Hefner, the CEO of Playboy, was invited to be interviewed. This eighty year old man walked out with four “help-from-a-bottle” blond hair and plastic surgery evident everywhere girlfriends. He said he loved each one equally, yet the girls shared that one of them was more special then the others. They were quick to say they weren’t jealous, and took turns. I was struck as the host laughed about their fornication, sexual lust, the lewd parties and how these women shared this eighty year old man who stated he would never marry. The audience laughed. I sat there thinking, what is wrong with everyone? Countless interviews with rapist and murderers talk about their addiction to pornography. We cover up these magazine covers in our stores, rate movies, and games and yet interview and are entertained by the very men who created the monster of pornography. The world even has it categorized into their idea of the process: soft porn, hard porn, child porn, and bestiality. It is the natural process for people wanting more and going deeper and deeper into this addiction and depravation.
Ephesians 4:18,19 says: They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
This subject is very close to me because it has not only been in our family, but I have been a victim of abuse several times in my life. At twenty-seven years old, I met a man, who introduced me to the depravity of a form of pornography initialed, B.D.S.M (Bondage, Domination, Sadist, Masochism). The world would characterize it as “hard porn.” I was shown movies and pictures of women being tortured and raped and beaten, and even worse. I became one his victims, and experienced the humiliation and regret of what some of these women I’m sure felt. This underworld is thriving on the internet. You can order a dominatrix to come right into your home. BDSM in definition is sex mixed with pain. My experience with this man was that he had so jaded himself with sex outside of God’s plan for sex, that his lust craved more and to go deeper. He was so wrapped in Satan’s web and deceit that he was clueless to the harm he was doing. I was amazed at how quickly thing progressed from a naughty little picture to the demonic nature of B.D.S.M.
Ted Bundy was a man raised in a good home, but who became addicted to pornography at the age of 12. He talked about how he had started with “soft porn” and then gradually continued to graduate to more and more depraved and evil hard core pornography. After pornography no longer satisfied, the only thing left for him to do was to commit the acts he saw in the magazines. After his first taste of killing, he continued, and started enjoying it. He has admitted to killing, raping, and torturing over sixteen women.
People are astonished at how many children are now being victimized. It is an epidemic that is growing more and more out of control. I believe it is a process that wraps the perpetrators in a demonic web that begins with just a small thing, and before they know it they are dealing with a monster. Child porn, also known as “kiddie porn” is rampant. With the internet it is easy for these demented men to pass it back and forth to each other. I could list story after story I have heard on the news of children raped, killed, kidnapped, and on and on it goes. There are some admirable people trying to help stop the epidemic. Dateline has a show called “To Catch A Predator.” They work with a group called “Perverted Justice.” They have adults sign in on line as children to lure these men into meeting them. As soon as they show up at the planned destination, they are arrested. Oprah Winfrey currently has an outstanding reward of $100,000 from her personal account for anyone who leads to the capture of child molesters on the FBI’s most wanted list. Six have been caught so far in the past year. It is a wonderful thing she is doing, and I imagine it makes her feel a sense of closure at the sexual abuse she endured when she was a child. I think both of these programs are an incredible way to draw attention to this out-of-control sin that plagues our entire world. But I also believe until everyone looks at every form of pornography, and attacks it, these horror stories of abuse will grow more rampant and more out-of-control.
As I mentioned before, I have been victimized several times in my life. At the age of twelve, I was molested by a friend of the family. I actually caught another family member molesting my little six year old cousin. Neither of these men were charged or sent to jail. As I got older, I got really mad about that, but I have now talked to so many people where the same thing occurred. Keeping it within the family is considered “normal.” My blood just boils, especially being that I was a victim of the secrecy as well as the abuse. When abuse is within families, it is like this huge, gigantic monster in the room that you can barely see around, and everyone ignores it!
If you have experienced the generational abuse, I can give you some hope. That chain can be broken. My father made a life changing decision to end the abuse that had plagued their family for four generations. As a result of his decision, my children are growing up in a home that is free from abuse. My husband’s father also made an amazing decision to stop the abuse in his family. As a result of his decision, my children have no clue about that abuse that has chased their family for four generations. My father and my father-in-law have changed our family’s legacy. Do not feel it is hopeless. You choose to stop that abuse. You can change the generational sin.
Exodus 20:5-6 talks about how sin affects to the third and fourth generation. But in verse six it says, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. By choosing to stop the family abuse, my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, are going to experience the legacy that began with my father and father-in-law. Isn’t that just amazing, and such a beautiful thing? If you find yourself in the legacy of generational abuse, you, right now, make that decision to end that legacy and create a new one. It may have been done to you, but choose to stop it now, and your one decision could affect the next one thousand generations to come.
And if by chance, you are an abuser, you can choose to stop also. Most abusers are found to be victims themselves of abuse. You too can end it. You have quite a mountain to overcome, but I believe that if you are sincere, God can work a miracle in your life. If you do not repent, and continue down this path, be prepared. I believe God’s wrath will pour onto you in the end times and your punishment will make you pray for an end to the torture. As hard as it is for me to write this paragraph that you too deserve forgiveness, I know that in forgiving the abuser, I let the cage that held me as a victim disappear, and I leave you in God’s hand. Whether you choose the wages of death or the wages of life, it is up to you.
The other promise I have found in Matthew 18 is: See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. I was so touched by this verse. Over each child is a beautiful angel watching, and going to the Father about whatever a child is going through. I believe that Jesus is so faithful to witness to these little hearts that he can bring beauty from the ashes of what they have endured. Jesus says, your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.
I believe Jesus has such a special plan for victims of abuse, if they will allow God to work in their lives.
I have a girlfriend that suffered at the hands of a man for ten years. Not only did he abuse her physically and sexually, but he molested his own daughters. I have watched her go through the pain-staking steps of crawling out of the hole of bondage that Satan had set her and her children in. I have tried to make sense of this, and God gave me a song, called Angel’s Lullaby. This is dedicated to her two little girls, Cana and Lacy.
We will never understand why sin taints the innocent,
Why babies suffer, why children must grieve,
To view the empty eyes of tortured souls
Weeping for a reprieve.
I must have asked God ten thousand times, “Why?”
To only hear Him cry
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
I know it’s not o.k., the price that you paid
Vengeance you want, bitterness eats away.
Don’t give in to that prisoner’s game,
It’s not yours to repay.
You can ask God ten thousand times, “Why?”
Listen, you’ll hear Him cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
It will never make sense.
We will never understand.
We may never know why.
But there’s a God who’ll hold you.
There’s a God who loves you.
He can wipe those tears away.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
By Michelle Rocker
Abuse is something that I really struggle to grapple and understand. I know that bad things happen because sin is in this world. But I’m always asking God how can he look on when children are molested, children or women are physically and mentally abused, or a woman being raped. I’ll be honest I don’t get it, and honestly, I’m not sure I will “get it” until I get to heaven.
After coming to this entry into my diary, and thinking about what I could share that I have found in scripture, I’ll admit I was at lost. I prayed and read through every scripture I could find about children. I came to a chapter in Matthew that I believes gives us some insight into how God cares for what happens to the innocent, especially children, and what he says will happen to those who hurt children. One thing became abundantly clear to me: Jesus loves and adores little children.
Mark 10:13-15: People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
In Matthew, Jesus was talking to his disciples who were fighting over who was going to be the favorite when they got to heaven. Once again, Jesus patiently explained by bringing a child forward, and tells them that they have to have the same heart as a child in order to be great in his kingdom. Then Jesus continues in Matthew 18:5-13: “And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to sin! Such things must come, but woe to the man through whom the come! If you hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and thrown in the fire of hell. See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. What do thing? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way, your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.
I want to encourage you to read that scripture again before continuing. I came to my own conclusions that God revealed to me, and ask God to reveal it to you, especially if you are a victim of abuse or you are a person that has inflicted abuse on someone else. Several things stuck out to me. In Mark 10, he was “indignant” when the disciples tried to prevent the children from coming to him. He told them to not “hinder” them from coming to them.
In Matthew 18, Jesus warns in this passage that children will be mistreated. He says, “Such things must come.” But he also makes it quite clear about how he feels toward the abuser: But if anyone causes one of these little ones to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. Those abuser’s who continue to continue in their path of harming and defiling the precious, innocent children are going to suffer worse then the children they have abuse.
I have so often wandered how God could allow abuse, and look on as a child is victimized. I think it all comes back to God doesn’t want robots serving him. He wants every man to choose to serve him. But as you well know, there are those who choose to live in sin. Not everyone will choose life in Christ. Romans 6:23 says, “The wages of sin is death.” And, wow, have we not seen wages sowed into pornography? I firmly believe that pornography is one of the reasons there are so many abduction of children, why the number there is such a number of women raped, and eventually why the little ones and women are killed. It is inevitable that the innocent will be harmed because of the wages that some men make the choice to perform.
I was watching a show where Hugh Hefner, the CEO of Playboy, was invited to be interviewed. This eighty year old man walked out with four “help-from-a-bottle” blond hair and plastic surgery evident everywhere girlfriends. He said he loved each one equally, yet the girls shared that one of them was more special then the others. They were quick to say they weren’t jealous, and took turns. I was struck as the host laughed about their fornication, sexual lust, the lewd parties and how these women shared this eighty year old man who stated he would never marry. The audience laughed. I sat there thinking, what is wrong with everyone? Countless interviews with rapist and murderers talk about their addiction to pornography. We cover up these magazine covers in our stores, rate movies, and games and yet interview and are entertained by the very men who created the monster of pornography. The world even has it categorized into their idea of the process: soft porn, hard porn, child porn, and bestiality. It is the natural process for people wanting more and going deeper and deeper into this addiction and depravation.
Ephesians 4:18,19 says: They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
This subject is very close to me because it has not only been in our family, but I have been a victim of abuse several times in my life. At twenty-seven years old, I met a man, who introduced me to the depravity of a form of pornography initialed, B.D.S.M (Bondage, Domination, Sadist, Masochism). The world would characterize it as “hard porn.” I was shown movies and pictures of women being tortured and raped and beaten, and even worse. I became one his victims, and experienced the humiliation and regret of what some of these women I’m sure felt. This underworld is thriving on the internet. You can order a dominatrix to come right into your home. BDSM in definition is sex mixed with pain. My experience with this man was that he had so jaded himself with sex outside of God’s plan for sex, that his lust craved more and to go deeper. He was so wrapped in Satan’s web and deceit that he was clueless to the harm he was doing. I was amazed at how quickly thing progressed from a naughty little picture to the demonic nature of B.D.S.M.
Ted Bundy was a man raised in a good home, but who became addicted to pornography at the age of 12. He talked about how he had started with “soft porn” and then gradually continued to graduate to more and more depraved and evil hard core pornography. After pornography no longer satisfied, the only thing left for him to do was to commit the acts he saw in the magazines. After his first taste of killing, he continued, and started enjoying it. He has admitted to killing, raping, and torturing over sixteen women.
People are astonished at how many children are now being victimized. It is an epidemic that is growing more and more out of control. I believe it is a process that wraps the perpetrators in a demonic web that begins with just a small thing, and before they know it they are dealing with a monster. Child porn, also known as “kiddie porn” is rampant. With the internet it is easy for these demented men to pass it back and forth to each other. I could list story after story I have heard on the news of children raped, killed, kidnapped, and on and on it goes. There are some admirable people trying to help stop the epidemic. Dateline has a show called “To Catch A Predator.” They work with a group called “Perverted Justice.” They have adults sign in on line as children to lure these men into meeting them. As soon as they show up at the planned destination, they are arrested. Oprah Winfrey currently has an outstanding reward of $100,000 from her personal account for anyone who leads to the capture of child molesters on the FBI’s most wanted list. Six have been caught so far in the past year. It is a wonderful thing she is doing, and I imagine it makes her feel a sense of closure at the sexual abuse she endured when she was a child. I think both of these programs are an incredible way to draw attention to this out-of-control sin that plagues our entire world. But I also believe until everyone looks at every form of pornography, and attacks it, these horror stories of abuse will grow more rampant and more out-of-control.
As I mentioned before, I have been victimized several times in my life. At the age of twelve, I was molested by a friend of the family. I actually caught another family member molesting my little six year old cousin. Neither of these men were charged or sent to jail. As I got older, I got really mad about that, but I have now talked to so many people where the same thing occurred. Keeping it within the family is considered “normal.” My blood just boils, especially being that I was a victim of the secrecy as well as the abuse. When abuse is within families, it is like this huge, gigantic monster in the room that you can barely see around, and everyone ignores it!
If you have experienced the generational abuse, I can give you some hope. That chain can be broken. My father made a life changing decision to end the abuse that had plagued their family for four generations. As a result of his decision, my children are growing up in a home that is free from abuse. My husband’s father also made an amazing decision to stop the abuse in his family. As a result of his decision, my children have no clue about that abuse that has chased their family for four generations. My father and my father-in-law have changed our family’s legacy. Do not feel it is hopeless. You choose to stop that abuse. You can change the generational sin.
Exodus 20:5-6 talks about how sin affects to the third and fourth generation. But in verse six it says, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. By choosing to stop the family abuse, my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, are going to experience the legacy that began with my father and father-in-law. Isn’t that just amazing, and such a beautiful thing? If you find yourself in the legacy of generational abuse, you, right now, make that decision to end that legacy and create a new one. It may have been done to you, but choose to stop it now, and your one decision could affect the next one thousand generations to come.
And if by chance, you are an abuser, you can choose to stop also. Most abusers are found to be victims themselves of abuse. You too can end it. You have quite a mountain to overcome, but I believe that if you are sincere, God can work a miracle in your life. If you do not repent, and continue down this path, be prepared. I believe God’s wrath will pour onto you in the end times and your punishment will make you pray for an end to the torture. As hard as it is for me to write this paragraph that you too deserve forgiveness, I know that in forgiving the abuser, I let the cage that held me as a victim disappear, and I leave you in God’s hand. Whether you choose the wages of death or the wages of life, it is up to you.
The other promise I have found in Matthew 18 is: See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. I was so touched by this verse. Over each child is a beautiful angel watching, and going to the Father about whatever a child is going through. I believe that Jesus is so faithful to witness to these little hearts that he can bring beauty from the ashes of what they have endured. Jesus says, your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.
I believe Jesus has such a special plan for victims of abuse, if they will allow God to work in their lives.
I have a girlfriend that suffered at the hands of a man for ten years. Not only did he abuse her physically and sexually, but he molested his own daughters. I have watched her go through the pain-staking steps of crawling out of the hole of bondage that Satan had set her and her children in. I have tried to make sense of this, and God gave me a song, called Angel’s Lullaby. This is dedicated to her two little girls, Cana and Lacy.
We will never understand why sin taints the innocent,
Why babies suffer, why children must grieve,
To view the empty eyes of tortured souls
Weeping for a reprieve.
I must have asked God ten thousand times, “Why?”
To only hear Him cry
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
I know it’s not o.k., the price that you paid
Vengeance you want, bitterness eats away.
Don’t give in to that prisoner’s game,
It’s not yours to repay.
You can ask God ten thousand times, “Why?”
Listen, you’ll hear Him cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
It will never make sense.
We will never understand.
We may never know why.
But there’s a God who’ll hold you.
There’s a God who loves you.
He can wipe those tears away.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Seeing the tears that you cry.
You’ve got an angel over you, baby
Singing your sad lullaby.
copyright © 2008 Michelle Rocker. All rights reserved.