THE POWER OF A SONG

 It hasn’t been a great year for me in terms of great years here on earth. I suppose those looking down from heaven at my story thus far may differ in that opinion. They say a person’s true character comes out when they are faced with hardship. I say a person’s true heart comes out when faced with hardship. That’s funny because in the last sentence I typed "heart ship" instead of hardship. I guess that is hardship--------of the heart.

I’ve already shared the story of my dad’s death and how it changed me forever. I will never ever be the same after those last days watching him cry out to God. Never. Ever. I loved that man so much.

That was only a tip of the "heart ship," so to speak, about my dad’s death. Someday I will be able to talk about the rest of that story--- the part of my dad’s death that really, truly broke my heart--the worst part.

For now, I want to tell you what happened next. After he died.

After he died I was hurting. It always seems that I manage to get through horrible times with strength, (and I must say a song that I played over and over and over) but then after all is said and done, I crash and all that I have been carrying suddenly crushes me under it’s weight. It was in that weakness, when the weight of all I had just endured fell upon my shoulders......that the devil came to play.

Of course he would, it wouldn’t be the first time. I recognized him instantly. He has come to play before. Yet last time he learned that I refuse to play with him in any capacity, so what better way to attack me then to go after one of my children, when I can barely stand. That’s what he did. Two birds with one stone, you might say.

He’ll do it to you too. So listen up to my story.

I had just gone through hell, a hell of which you know only a piece of the story. I could barely breathe. I could barely stand. That is when he loves to strike. When I was in my weakest state, "in the inner cell, my feet fastened in stocks," the devil came to mess with me through one of my children.

Like I said, I could barely breathe. I could barely stand. It was the worst time for him to strike. Or is it? I just sunk to my knees. I knew I didn’t have the strength to handle anything, let alone this. I also knew that I had God to fight this battle.

I endured it the best that I could, praying every step of the way. I called in prayer warriors knowing that my prayers may not be enough. I told God, "You know what state I am in right now. I have nothing in me to fight with but know this: whatever you need me to do to help my child I will do. "

"I may not be able to stand but I will surely crawl if I have to -- I will crawl through anything, over anything, around anything...whatever it takes... I will do... whatever it takes. I may not be strong right now, but my love is strong. My faith is strong.. and I have You."

I did have to crawl and fight and crawl some more ---for quite a while until all I had left was to crawl in one more direction.

Like I had been drawn to the place where I first went to church -- again I was drawn to a church. This time I "crawled" into the sanctuary of the church where my child grew up. Again, like the story of my first church, the doors were wide open and I met with no one.

Miracles happen in churches with open doors.

I crawled to the altar and I laid it all right there. I spoke aloud not caring who, if anyone even heard me. I cried until I had no tears left. Tears for my dad… Tears for my child… Tears for me. I crawled back into a pew and just sat there for what seemed like forever.

When it seemed like I was out of tears, out of things to say, out of everything...one thing kept tugging on my heart.

I could barely breathe. I could barely stand. My nose was stuffed, my eyes were dry and I was literally choking for breath. Yet one thing was tugging on my heart. Tugging, and tugging.

The thought that kept running through my heart -- yes through my heart right then was--- in the state that I was in-----if I could just sing--------if I could just sing a song of praise to God-----I love to sing and I love God and if I could just sing a song of praise to God..... I did not really think much further than that but I knew "if only I could sing a song of praise to God...."

Mark 5: 28 "..because she thought, 'If I just touch His clothes, I will be healed."

If only I could sing a song of praise.

Like I said, I love to sing. I have a pretty good voice but like I said, I could barely breathe. I don’t even remember what came out of my mouth. I do not know what song actually rose from the depths of my soul. I bet God remembers.

To me, though it came from my heart, it sounded horrible. To God, I believe it was a symphony.

After I sang, I simply left. I drove home. As I turned the corner to my street, a corner where another church stood, the sign out front of the church caught my eye. When I had left on that journey that day the sign announced an upcoming church event. In the time I was away, the sign had been changed to a Bible verse that I will not soon forget.

A simple version of Revelations 3:11: "Behold, I come quickly."

I got home and within hours the situation was diffused, the chains were cut, and the prayers had been answered.

I am hoping for happier times in the very near future. Love, prayer, and songs have more power than you will ever know.

Believe me--- I know.